Sunday, October 25, 2009

Sunday Slides, Funny, Caption Contest

First for a cool easy give away you should hit up the stunningly sexy Sandi!!!

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE
FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE


1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays; I go on Fridays.

2.... We also sleep in separate beds.
Hers is in California , and mine is in Texas .

3. I take my wife everywhere....
but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker.
She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!"
So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor.
I asked where the car was.
She told me, "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack, and looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!"

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.

11. I married Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name wasAlways.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though.
My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!"

1. Some of y'all need this button!

2. Chandelier.

3. I think she could convince me to be a Buckeye!


4. Amen to that!




One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'

'It depends,' I replied.

'What does it say on your shirt?'

He yelled back, ' USC ! '

And they say blondes are dumb....

Caption Contest, surely y'all can come up wih some good stuff for this one!


Give it a shot, go hit the damn link, steal any pics you want send bobie pics for each one you steal. Have a groooooooooovy weekend!

6 comments:

Janie Woods said...

LOVE the blonde joke!

Caption: I got nuthin'...*sigh

TentCamper said...

"Don't worry Marv...that loud bang was me slamming a door. Stay in bed, I'm about to make you some bacon!"

or

"Fuck them Army snipers...I got me this here fucker from my bedroom window... with a 22."

Trooper Thorn said...

Caption: Remember when your parents told you pets had gone to live at a nice farm where he could run around? This is the farm.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

HA! Funny, and a little offensive. Good combo ;)

Momma Sunshine said...

LOVE the chandelier. Too funny!!

Danielle said...

Why, grandma, what big guns you have!

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