Sunday, October 4, 2009

Sages Sunday Slides and Sillies, Caption Contest

1. New medical research shows........

2. LOL

Is this 486-5731?


"Hi honey.

This is Daddy.
Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No Daddy.
She's upstairs in the bedroom
with Uncle Paul."

After a brief pause,

Daddy says, "But honey,
you haven't got an Uncle Paul."

"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room
with Mommy, right now."

Brief Pause.

"Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.
Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs
and knock on the bedroom door
and shout to Mommy that Daddy's car
just pulled into the driveway."

"Okay Daddy, just a minute."

A few minutes later
the little girl comes back to the phone.

"I did it Daddy."

"And what happened honey?"

"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed
with no clothes on and ran around screaming.

Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser
and now she isn't moving at all!"

"Oh my God!!!
What about your Uncle Paul?"

"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.
He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window
and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn't
know that you took out the water last week to clean it.
He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's

***Long Pause***

***Longer Pause***

***Even Longer Pause***

Then Daddy says,
"Swimming pool?

Is this 486-5731

3. Meet me for dinner?

4. Sissy.

A wealthy women is being shown around the hospital. During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.

'Oh my GOD!' screamed the woman. 'That's disgraceful! Why is he doing that?'

The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, "I'm very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn't do that at least five times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture."

"Oh, well in that case, I guess it's okay," said the woman.

As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him. Again, the woman screamed, "Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?"

Again the doctor spoke very calmly: "Same illness, better insurance."

Ok now I know y'all will knock this one outta the park!!

Caption contest.......

Leave your caption in the comment box. I think TC will will hands down. You should all go right now and hit up In The Real World Mars vs Venus and Sageville!


Keith Wilcox said...

I'm not even going to try to caption that photo (I'm not very creative :-) but, what the hell could she be thinking!? "Go on HAVE A FAG!" Isn't it hilarious how the meanings of words change over time? hahahahah

Not a soccer mom said...

'Bustin' out!

These were a great way to start my Sunday morning. Thanks

TentCamper said...

caption - "Dang...people keep staring at me...shit, I'll just use my hand to cover my privates."


(cracking up)"shit...someone just told me that my bathing suit was on backwards."


"I knew I'd figure out a way to avoid the nipple chaffing from my bathing suit."

Anonymous said...

Those are some great ones this week. As for the caption first thing that came to mind.... Hole in One!

Anonymous said...

Excellent captions!!

Missty said...

Good ones.

Captions.... hmmm.... "Man I look hot in this suit, look at everyone checking me out."

"Pink is so my color"

"I love my suit, but its just a tad snug in some places."

"Don't you just hate underwire."

"I wonder if I will get wierd tan lines?"

I'm out, thats all I got.

Candice said...

Yeah, I got nuthin' on the caption.

I'm pretty sure I'm visually impaired now, however.

Janie Woods said...

"So THIS is how you avoid tan lines!!"

"I think my beach balls need air"

"I'm ready for my close up, Mr. Hefner"

And thanks for explaining why my husband thinks I'm the smartest woman alive!!

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