Whattya Mean You Don’t Know Your Age?

My son turned three back in September. Let me just stress right now that he is the apple of my eye and I love him more than words could adequately explain. He has truly changed my life and even though his mom and I are no longer together, I want to continue to be a positive influence in his life as well as a constant…always being around for him.

I say that because I'm about to complain and get some frustrations out, and I really don't want anybody believing that I think any less of my son. He is my world.

Okay…the kid can't talk. He says words from time to time, but they're mumbled or muffled or don't make any sense at all. The Ex and I both believe that he needs tubes in his ears (he sees a specialist later this month) and that the talking will develop ten-fold once he can truly hear and understand exactly what he's saying. His hearing is fine, too…he's already passed hearing tests and seems to know what we tell him most of the time.

When sitting with a picture book, asking him to find objects like turtles and oranges and ducks are a joy because the kid seems to be able to pick out just about anything. It's quite impressive, actually.

But over the weekend we were playing Chutes & Ladders. Obviously, it's a bit of a stretch to get him to understand the concept at this point…but I thought it'd be fun to try. So I'm spinning the little dial and asking him to tell me what number it lands on (it was a 3). He doesn't know. No worries, I think. I tell him and get him to repeat it out loud and we continue to play.

He lands on the same number. He has no idea what it is.

Okay…how about if I count out loud? Maybe he just can't recognize the numbers on a page. Surely he can count to five, right?

"One…two…"

"Eight?"

Sigh.

"No, buddy…there's no eight. How old are you?"

Shrugs.

"Well, you knew your age on your birthday. How old are you, buddy?"

"Eight?"

"No, buddy. One…two…"

Silence.

I was a bit stunned. I really thought that between the babysitter he's with every day and his mom (who has custody) that surely NUMBERS would have entered into the equation at some point. I mean, it's awesome to know colors and I don't expect him to know the alphabet yet (especially where he can't even pronounce words correctly), but why can't he even count to three yet?

Am I expecting too much out of him? Am I expecting too much out of him mom? Should I take it upon myself to be his numeric teacher? I know I shouldn't be frustrated, but am I really out of line by feeling this way?

A Day That Will Live On Forever

I don’t want to sound like I am beating an old, worn out drum, but I have to throw this out at you all.

This past Sunday was my son’s 8th birthday and both of my boys were with Mariah and I for the weekend.

We have been very excited about this birthday weekend and have been throwing around ideas about what to do for him and what to get him. I know that we talked about taking him rock climbing and buying him a ‘big boy bike’ on Twitter and our blogs. Now this post has two connected, but separate parts.

First of all, as some of you already know, my EX is a blogger and is also on Twitter. I know that she (and or her friends) read/monitor pretty much everything that Mariah and I say while online (and I know I should be more careful about what I say…but I really don’t care if she knows what I am saying.) That being said, I have been confronted by her regarding misinterpreted things that I’ve said and done, and she has brought them to her lawyer and into court. Still…the bottom line is that I know that I am a good father. I know that I have a safe and secure home. I know that the children in this house are very well cared for….and I know that she just wants to feel in control or that she is better than I am. The fact that she and her friends lurk around our blogs and Twitter updates and are too embarrassed or feeble to show their faces …says a little something about all of their characters. (*so ‘other side’ when you read this please feel free to comment and state your opinion ‘like a man.’)

Secondly…We decided to buy a big boy bike (two wheeler) for my son for his birthday. He has mentioned to me that he does not have one and does not know how to ride one. (Personally, I think that every kid (especially boys) should have the opportunity to learn to ride a bike by 5 or 6.) Anyway, I do not know what the reasoning is for why his mother never bought him a bike or encouraged the ‘nanny’ to teach him….but I am glad now. One of the best feelings in the world was getting this bike for him, taking him across the street to the school yard and teaching him to ride like the wind.

After getting to the playground I held the back of his seat while spouting out all of my words of wisdom that pertain to learning to ride a bike; “Always look straight in front of you. Pedal a bit faster. Hold your body up straight. If you feel you are going to fall…put your feet down. Don’t be afraid to fall. Did I tell you how many times I crashed learning to ride?” and the list went on and on. Within no more than 10 minutes, he was riding all by himself. I was amazed…but not nearly as amazed as he was. He told me on the way to the school that he was scared and did not know if he could do it. His face was glowing all day long. by his attitude and the expression on his face...this was far better than a free pass at a candy or toy store. He was so proud of himself. Little mini me could just be the XGames 2018 winner. He definitely got an A+ from this bike instructor.

This I know for sure…neither he nor I will ever forget the fact that we did this together. From my past and from this experience…I know that for a father and son, this is what it is all about.

When their mother came to pick them up, he was so excited to show her that he could now ride a bike…he jumped on and burned rubber all the way down the block and back. Upon his return, she looked at him and said, “Wow…great…cuz a bike is exactly what someone else got you for your birthday.” My son also had mentioned to me that his mother was having a rock climbing party for him. (see BOLD statements above)

I don’t worry though…the first learning how to ride a bike and dad teaching is one thing that even his mother will never be able to take from either one of us…though she may try.