Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Things I Repeat, Say What? Things I Repeat

Apart from the above being one of my favourite jokes, those of an irritable ilk anyhow, I have come to realise that there are many parenting statements, or phrases, that I find myself saying a lot.

A lot, a lot, a lot, a lot.

I thought I would put together a top ten, and see if anyone else is using the same, or has their own gems of reiteration.

Here goes;

1. Calm Down

Used on a repeat-to-fade basis, between the hours of 7-30am and 7-30pm.

2. Settle Down

Used on a repeat-to-fade basis, from 7-30pm until shut-eye status is achieved.

3. Focus on the positive

A phrase I use when my son points out that things have not gone exactly as he had hoped, or if his every whim is not catered for within nanoseconds.

4. You Muppet

Useful for moments just after my son has ignored my advice of focusing on the positive.

5. What do you want to eat/wear/do?

My mistake ridden, glib, speaking before thinking. Everyone knows you need to give kids options, otherwise their answers will never do.

6. Are you on prescribed medication?

An affectionate phrase spoken shortly after my son has confused me with his latest request or action, often followed with;

7. You are never right

Again, affection unbound.

8. One or none?

A question I pose when my son stretches the boundaries of reasonableness. When he demands two ice creams for example, I reiterate his options ‘one or none?’ (Can be used in conjunction with number 3)

9. You know the drill/we do this every day

Reminding him that the routine is well established, and thus moaning about it will just lengthen the process

10. I love you

Something I say to my boy, everyday, lots, and while he is responsible for this action, I am not holding it against him.

So there is my ten, I am sure to be revisiting this list, and probably have missed a few.

But, more importantly, what are yours?


ChocDrop said...

I have used the following:

1. We'll see (my kids HATE that one) It gives me no commitment factor....lol which isn't good but also gives me an out when I want to watch the Draft...hee hee

2. Have you really thought about that?

3. Do you know how much that costs? Response, but mom you have a checkbook/credit card. Like the account doesn't have $5 in it, and the credit card isn't maxed when we went out to eat...hee hee

4. If you don't sit down and watch the movie/tv I will change the channel

5. Go help your sister.

Those are a few of the ones I used to use the most. Good post, made me think back on those crazy days..

tammy said...

I actually came out with my own CD at Christmas time, just because I was tired of saying the same things over and over again.

To name just a few:

Do your homework.

Did you brush did you flush?

Leave your brother alone.


What the hell?

Quit talking and go to sleep.

Leave the dog alone.

I'm the parent, not you.

Susan said...

Settle Down.

Let's GO!

If you speak to me again that way, you'll get a time out!


I'm not cooking two meals. Either this or cereal.

Hi boogers.

I love you.

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Today's words are at least better than last weeks:

Stop looking at your sister. Don't breath on her, don't even think about her.
Hyper Diaper mommy does NOT want you to spit in her hair.
Please get dressed, brush your teeth (over and over).
Stop screaming.
Stop screaming in the car.
Stop screaming Full Stop!

In my head I'm saying:
Where's the nearest asylum, I wanna check myself in for a vacation.

Kathy B! said...

#4 I call mine coconuts instead of muppets :)

#10 No matter how many times you say it, it's always worth saying again :)

Great post!

TentCamper said...

Nice work Brotha!!!

Some things that I find myself saying a lot include:
No Yelling
Take it outside
Turn the music down
Share with your sister
I say no because your mom already said no
...and then some of the TentCamper exclusives:
Shut up or I'll staple your mouth shut
no! you are staying in the closet until morning
I know we are on the highway...but get out of the car
...you know ...shit like that!

Amber said...

I'm gonna steal your "One or None"!

-Did you have a good snooze?
-Stop bothering your brother
-Can you not do that
-Recycling/Garbage!(as in H, put this in the recycling bin please, only, he responds to one word instructions)
-You're my favorite older/younger brother
-You are not to leave the table while you are eating
-Take a deep breath, think about what you want to say, and say it
-I Would Like...(am teaching the lil one to not to say I WANT)
Please wait your turn, you're interrupting me
-Can I hang you upside down by your toenails in the closet? (my mom passed this one down to me)

dadshouse said...

I love you is at the top!

I also say "turn off the TV!", and "turn off the TV, dammit!"

Then there's me trying to be hip: "yo! What be the hizzy?"

To which my kids simply say: "dawg."

Daddy Geek Boy said...

This is a great post.

Since I have a 3 year old, "No" is on the top of my list. Followed closely by, "You're not listening to me."

Right up there is, "Do you know how much I love you?"

Next is, "You're such a monkey."

Lady Mama said...

Just found your blog, hi.

Mine are:
1. Gently, GENTLY! (when son is grabbing dog)
2. Don't do that please.
3. Daddy's at work darling (in response to son standing at window, nosed pressed against it groaning Daaddyyy daaddyyyy)

I'm also a fan of "you muppet" (are you Brittish too?)

Good post!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

This was sweet...

Some of the most common ones are:

Go cry in your room and shut the door so I can't hear you.

WHAT!!! (in response to MOMMY! MOMMY!)

That's just creepy hon... (in response to my son doing almost anything)

I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine!

Take off your swimming suit and put your school clothes back on (every morning before my daughter has to go to pre-school)

Love ya baby! :)

I'll let you if you give me a kiss on the cheek.

Because I said so...

You don't need to know why.

We need to be a level 1 and you are at level 10!

Just Jules said...

So, I had to pay attention today - I came up with this
1) uuuugggghhh Seriously!
2) chew with your mouth closed
3) Don't talk back, just say "yes mom"
4) Really? (As in do you really insist on driving me crazy? goes hand in hand with really)
5) What? (at any point in time there is one of the four yelling at me about something)
6) go downstairs and do that
7) Who you talkin to, cuz I'm sure you wouldn't talk to your mom that way
8) I love you to the moon and back

Kristen said...

Well my daughter is only 4 so here are the popular ones around here:
1. Timeout!
2. The Dr. said you have to
3. Are you listening to me?
4. It's nap time (dammit).
5. What did you just say?
6. Please, Thank you and all that other crap while trying to teach her manners.

Single Parent Dad said...

ChocDrop - I see myself developing a need to introduce number 1.

Tammy - We should sort out a greatest hits.

Susan - Settle down is a good one.

Blogging Mama Andrea - Lots of stop screaming variations there!

Kathy B! - Cheers, and I'll try a lovely bunch of coconuts.

TentCamper - High five. And I'm liking 'take it outside'.

Amber - Steal away.

Dadshouse - Dawggy Dawg

Daddy Geek Boy - Cheers. Monkey should have a place in everyone's vocabulary.

Lady Mama - Hi. I certainly am a Brit.

Shelle-BlokThoughts - Because I said so, is raising its ugly head here.

Just Jules - Really has a multitude of applications.

Kristen - My son is 4 too, but I am unsure if the Dr said you have to would work, will have to give it a blast.

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