1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.
2. If the shoe fits - buy them in every color.
3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila.
4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!
5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).
6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.
8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.
9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
10. Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny.
11. When life gives you lemons in 2009 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.
12. Remember where ever there is a good looking; sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bullshit!
13. Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest.
14. If it has Tires or Testicles it's gonna give you trouble.
15. By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.
'Good friends are like stars.........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there' 'Remember yesterday, dream about tomorrow, but live for today'. Now smile and send to any girl wasting time at work, suffering from a hangover, or just suffering from life , that might need a reason to smile!
Well come on now it ain't gonna fold itself!
Don't know if this is just a sick coincidence but....
2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of
Asia
2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian
racing
2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic kills hundreds of pigs
around the globe.
Has any one else noticed this???!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It gets worse........
next year......
2010 - Chinese year of the Cock - what could possibly go wrong?
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hehehehe I'm for it!
Caption Contest! Give this one your best shot!
I got nothing! Hope y'all have a big ole lazy Sunday!
Southern Sage
15 comments:
Caption - how come this one is bigger then the one I saw in the shower daddy?
'Tired of too much technology, Blogging, texting, facebook and myspace, the Johnstons went back to nature...but something went terribly wrong in the time capsule'
I can't get past #12! Too funny!
News Headline... "Parents outraged at the incestuous overtones in the new Planet Of The Apes movie."
"Daddy...Why is mommy not interested in it? It is so big and...fun to play with."
"Careful honey...these are very delicate jewels."
omg.
Next year, I'm picking the Halloween costumes.
that's kinda crazy, year of the Cock
Really? Those outfits aren't folding themselves, Tuck it UNDER already DAD!
Funny list though ... rock ON!
blessings!
They didn't give me one of these on my costume...
#8 explains my life!!! :)
I LOVE the parenting slide. My kids regularly like to play in the dog crate and lock each other in there.
I'm speechless. Seriously, WHAT did you google to find that?
"Even little old ladies knitting things on a porch can creep the shit out of people!"
Sex Ed on Crack
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