Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Captivated by Middle Aged Women

I’ve been getting whiplash lately, from turning my head too quickly when certain woman walk by. No, I’m not talking about hot French women, or the nubile creatures that make for an older men younger women relationship.

I’m talking about middle-aged women. And I’m captivated.

I know, I know, as a middle-aged single parent I should already be chasing women my age. And I do date women within ten years of me, plus or minus. (Ten isn’t so much when you’re an old man like me!) But truthfully, any gorgeous woman will turn a man’s head, no matter her age.

And for some reason, my head is turning in spades for middle-aged women.

It all started when I went to a seamstress’s house to pick up a dress she’d worked on for my teen daughter. The woman who answered the door was late-40s, dark hair with gray streaks, olive skin with wrinkles, and a smile that could warm anyone's heart.

She had a certain confidence about who she was. Like she’d lived a full life, and was totally comfortable in her skin.

The walls of her house were covered with photos of her kids, and it’s clear some of those kids had already graduated high school. Of course, I immediately looked for a ring on her finger, and photos of a man – any sign of a husband.

Alas (for me), she was married.

But I was struck by a spell. And I don’t just mean from this one woman. I mean every woman in her 40s (give or take)

I now check out middle-aged women when I hit the grocery store, in a coffee house, when I’m out running. I’m looking for that sexy confidence, that wisdom, that I’m vibrant and alive and I don’t care what you think about me sort of attitude.

I can’t wait for the next high school sporting event, and not just to cheer on my daughter. I’ll be checking the stands over and over again for the ring-less middle-aged woman who makes me melt.

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29 comments:

BigLittleWolf said...

The (oh-so-hot) French have a lovely term for a woman who is 40+ --- "A woman of a certain age."

It is a very graceful way to say a woman who has some experience, and is luscious, knowing, and mature.

Glad you are discovering some women of a certain age - who will, no doubt, be appreciative of your many charms!

Chapter Two said...

I am laughing the whole time thinking about all the times I am without my wedding ring.

I make meatballs (taking it off to avoid the goo under the diamond) and forget to put it back on for a week.
Just did the same thing making granola the other day.... hmmm....

But, I get it - totally. There is nothing sexier then someone who is comfortale with themselves. It is something that comes with age I believe. You reach a point where you say -"well, I'm not changing obviously"

great post

Anonymous said...

Oh I have always been down with that! Of course I never kicked one out because she was to young, ya know,
eighteen to eighty
blind, freaky or crazy

But the older they are the better I like em it seems.

BFD.... I would venture to say women with rings are MORE appealing to a huge group of doods! They have something to lose and generally don't sweat doods like single chicks do I hear.

x said...

I'm 37, do I qualify? P.S. What does FWB mean (that you mentioned on my blog the other day). I know it can mean Friends With Benefits - is that what you meant?

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Okay well good luck with that. I'm not middle aged so I don't qualify ;)

MindyMom said...

Well, DUH!

Says she-who-is-almost-40.

;)

dadshouse said...

Mindy - every person is different, and in general, men and women mature at different rates. A few years ago I wanted nothing to do with women in their 40s because they were so settled and comfortable in their ways. I didn't want them to mold me. I needed to change on my own. Now I'm ready. So, what might be "Well, DUH" to you took some time for me.

Pippi - friends with benefits, indeed.

Missty said...

As a mid 40's woman, thank you.

And really I love my age - I am not wishing in anyway I was younger... not that I want to get older, because I don't. lol I really like where I am.

Kids are older, more money in the house (unless it is needed for those older kids!) lol More comfortable within myself.

And besides its great knowing you can still turn a head or two! ;o) lol

OneZenMom said...

I have a dear friend in his 40s who had been chasing girls in their early 20s for the 15+ years that I've known him.

I've told him more than once that he would have a lot more fun and a lot less heartache if he graduated up to women in their mid-30s to mid-40s.

Forget Redheads. It's the "mature" women who really have more fun. ;)

Missty said...

What a minute Zenmom.... How about Redheads in their mid 40's?
Just sayin' ;o)

Unknown said...

i'm captivated by this post--i always knew you had impeccable taste and would come around to our charms! it's great to hang out with someone who remembers R.E.M. when michael stipe had hair...

TentCamper said...

I have to say that I hear ya!!!
Not that I have eyes for anyone but my sexy mama Mariah...but I don't think that I could be attracted to someone who is not a 40'ish mother. That might sound weird, but with that combination...if you turn a guy's head...you've got the whole package goin on.

Shit...I make no sense...I'll shut up.

Mama Llama said...

I'll be 38 this year and going through this divorce makes me feel like I'm spent. My friends ask me about when I'll start dating again, and I can't answer them because I'm so full of doubts due to age, children, etc. that I (right now) feel that will never happen.

This post made me feel much better. Thank you, Dads. Be well.

Unknown said...

tentcamper, i think you are making perfect sense! part of the chemistry is having enough in common to know where the other person is coming from...it wouldn't work for me to date someone who didn't understand the practicalities of parenting and child care, for example.

dadshouse said...

As usual, there is a lengthy and different discussion on this topic going on in the introductory post on my blog: http://dadshouseblog.com/2010/03/17/captivated-by-middle-aged-women/

Both discussions are great, here and there.

Kat Wilder said...

They don't call us cougars for nothing.
Grrowl ...
(altho I hate that term)

All that means is that experience counts!

Nicki said...

There's something to be said for sexy, confident middle aged women. At least...that's what I've been told... ;) (By HIM. He has to say those things, right?)

Unknown said...

nicki, you are nowhere near middle-aged. in attitude and otherwise!

Jack Steiner said...

it's great to hang out with someone who remembers R.E.M. when michael stipe had hair...

I sat down at a parent/teacher conference and talked about this very topic. Twenty seven year old teacher asked me how to dress for the upcoming 80's day, had never heard of Oingo Boingo and talked about the Brady Bunch as those 50 years old who were on television once.

Danielle said...

Oh, thank you for this post! I will be 40 this year and am going to be single. Now I have to work on the head turning thing! :)

Anonymous said...

I've never thought of myself as a middle-aged-woman before. I suppose after reading this post I may look at things differently. Thanks for sharing...

Dr. Heckle said...

I don't know if it's because I'm getting older or what, but women seem to be sexier older than they used to be. Although I do have to draw a line somewhere... If she's got gray hair "down there," that scares me a little...

sweetsinnergwen said...

Glad I am not alone. I am 30, look like I am 25 and think men over 40 are incredibly sexy. Love your blog. Look forward to reading more.

web designing jacksonville said...

I dont know if you work but either change jobs or get another, Im sure you will meet friends there. Let me know how you get on.

web designing jacksonville said...

it usually because it's a done deal, they've exhausted their desires for each other and when they have sex, it's so rare that they have been reduced to driving on near empty.

Joanna Cake said...

Feel free to ogle this sexy middle-aged woman any time! You know, I feel fitter and more gorgeous than I ever was when I was younger.

It must be the release from all those hormones :)

Anonymous said...

I'm one of "those", except I look 15+ years younger.
Women come in different packages, even if they are the same age. I'd probably be "too young" for you, eventhough not really.

???

Anonymous said...

Oh, and, I find us far hotter than the younger chicks ! It's so interesting to see that so many think everyone envies the younger.... uh uh..

Give me a woman (yes, I like to look, too ! ;))

Anonymous said...

I'm 38 but people meeting me for the first time seem to think I'm in my early 30s. I feel 'hotter' than I've ever been and have more energy and confidence. I love this age. I believe I'll be with my husband for life (no matter if we were just living like room mates). But if the relationship ended, I just don't want another man. If I'm ever on my own again, I'm staying that way.

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