Sunday, March 8, 2009

Sunday Slides, Caption Contest,

Well first I have to tell you about my ex-wife, she is a pilot and had a bad scare last week. My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final, later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon I got a phone call, that she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting. Seems she was forced to make an emergency landing in Hamilton because of bad weather. Thank God the kids weren't with her.

The FAA issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: She was flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating).
The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

The photograph below was taken at the scene to show the extent of damage to her aircraft.
She was really lucky.

Come on now thats funny right there!!!



If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.


A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.


A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.


A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.


Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house

Also if you have a daughter you should hit this post Contract to Date my Daughter.

1. That's just mean for her to take the dog off!

2. Need AC work? Here is your man.

3. Ok I'm in!

4. I spect some of y'all feel this way!

5. Me and Maxine are on the same page here for sure.

6. Haaaaaaaaaaaaa

Caption Contest.......

Amaze your friends, be the first to tell them:

At five minutes and six seconds after 4 AM on the 8th of July this year, the time and date will be 04:05:06 07/08/09. This will never happen again!!!!!!!!!!

Now gimmie your caption and then go hit Sageville Slides. (nsfw) <---- that always gets em to look!


Rhea said...

I can't believe there's an air conditioning company called Stiff Nipples. That's hilarious.

And that broom in the ground. hehe

And the caption photo...hmmm...I'm at a loss. That tree is awesome.

Just me... said...

"Mary can barely contain her excitment regarding her botanical find, the rare Magnacockalicious Satisfacticus tree!"

~*Jobthingy*~ said...

i have seen the stiff nipples one before. cracks me up

Anonymous said...

"No Dear, you got back to the hotel room. I'll be along shortly."


"10,000 years later, an alien species uncovers a photograph that explains the end of the human race. Men no longer needed."

TentCamper said...

"I wonder if I, can, just, pull ,one of these off. GOD...They feel good in my hands!"

Anonymous said...

I feel kinda left out, evidently my size is up higher than the pic shows!

Not a soccer mom said...

'Palm' tree

Just A Chic... said...

When Jane killed a buried her dick of a husband 20 years ago, she never dreamed this would happen!

Swirl Girl said...

"Gee, I guess those Extenze really do work?? Oh , Bill, dear...."

nitebyrd said...

"Evelyn was overjoyed with the results of her Viagra/MiracleGro fertilizer mix."

Anonymous said...

Lol y'all ain't right.

Pick-a-dick palm tree??

Kim said...

Mary, realizing it was illegal to deface a national park, wondered how she could break one off and stick it in her, uh, purse.

Twenty Four At Heart said...

Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!

katherine. said...

"Lorena Bobbitt finally reveals to authorities where she buried the piece she cut off."

rachael chatoor said...

The first joke is hilarious.


On a lifelong quest to see if there is anywhere in the world where money actually does grow on trees, Aggie is thrilled to stumble across the often talked about, but never photographed, "penis tree".

Anonymous said...

Great funnies.


"Men are like trees. Sometimes you have to dig deep to find a good one."

heh heh

SweetPeaSurry said...

Ahhh I'm only 1/3 through my first overnight shift in a long while. The laughs helped keep me from curling up under my desk and falling asleep.


Anonymous said...

Y'all ain't right!! excellent captions! ha

Amber said...

"Mary searched the world far and wide for a great piece of wood This is what she found."
I love the pic of the chick, makes me giggle

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

A day late for Sunday but I had to say, I laughed at the broom picture. Alot.

T said...

The differences between men and women.... so TRUE!!

Thanks for the giggles Sage!

Amorous Rocker said...

"A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house"

Lol! That one killed me for some reason.

Love the broom thing too.

The time and date thing is cool as hell. I'll have to remember that. =)

dizzy mom said...

Can I get the address to lick-a-chick. I would like to put myself on the menu :)

dizzy mom said...

Sadly #4 is all too familiar...

Anonymous said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


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