Monday, March 30, 2009

Ask Hot Dads - Week 2

1. Does anyone in your family read your blog? If so how do you feel about it and does it inhibit what you say and talk about?


TentCamper (I Pee In The Wind) says: Obviously Mariah (you) reads my blog and I think that our eldest daughter has seen it a few times…other than that my ex-wife does (at least I think she does) I sometimes hesitate knowing that our daughter might read it, but we’ve talked with her abut it and explained that what we write is a combination of fiction and non fiction. I feel comfortable with what I write and do not really care who sees it. If you KNOW me…you won’t judge me.

Cameron (Get The Stink Off) says: My wife does not read it, she knows I blog but doesn't read it. My MOM once stumbled upon it, she said it was funny except I use the f-bomb too much. I told her it's probably not material for MOM and to NOT read it anymore.

DaddyGeekBoy says: My wife is a regular reader. The rest of my family checks in sporadically. For a while, my mom-in-law’s excuse was that she didn’t think she was "supposed" to be reading it. I kindly explained to her that when I’m posting things for the entire world to see, she was included in the target audience. Because my blog is public, I don’t delve into my extended family’s dynamics. Though there’s a lot I could write about, it will remain private.

Hubman (Hubman’s Hangout) says: Oh hell no! Have you seen my blog? I suspect that I'm the odd-ball among the Hot Dads in that my wife and I have sex with others and we write about it, and post the occasional nekkid pictures. So yeah, I have the freedom to say whatever I want, but would NOT be pleased if other family members found it.

Southern Sage (Welcome to Sageville) says: Not no but Hell no! (at least I sure hope not!)

David (Dad’sHouse) says: My brother does. One time, I told a story about him and my daughter, and I took some artistic license that made him look bad. HE COMMENTED! Oh shit. Sorry, bro!

Russ (Dads Who Mock the World) says: The Wife does and I do pull some punches.

LiteralDan says: Some of my immediate family members read my blog regularly, and other relatives read occasionally. I wouldn't say outright that it inhibits my writing, but I know this fact does affect it in small ways, some posts more than others.

Kevin (AlwaysHomeAndUncool) says: My wife does regularly, which is cool, and my sister does occasionally, which is a bit freaky because -- eeew, it's my sister. I'm not sure it inhibits me much because I'm generally as odd, whiny and annoying on my blog as I am in real life.

2. Some of the Hot Dads post some highly intimate moments in their lives on the HD blog and on their own personal blogs (the sex toys post comes to mind). How do the wives/girlfriends/significant others feel about that information being shared?

Also, have any of their kids stumbled across these posts?

Blogging Mama

TentCamper (I Pee In The Wind) says: As you know…from the above question, Mariah reads everything I post and …we sit right next to each other while writing and blogging…so I hide nothing. There are things that I don’t talk about, but she is not one who is scared to talk about sex…and we do not know all of you. It is not like I will run into you at church or the elementary school. See above answer about kids.

Cameron (Get The Stink Off) says: I don't really post super-intimate stuff. My wife doesn't really care what I write, as long as I don't paint her in a horrible light. She is actually more concerned with me posting stuff about the kids….a privacy thing.
And Nope, kids are too young to surf.

DaddyGeekBoy says: My blog generally makes me look clueless while hoisting my wife upon a golden pedestal festooned with rose petals dipped in chocolate, so she generally doesn’t have a problem with it. My kids are too young to read, so when I read it to them I just substitute “Curious George” for myself and they’re amused.

Hubman (Hubman’s Hangout) says: While my wife (Another Suburban Mom aka Veronica) and I have our own blogs, there are no "blog secrets" between us. There are things we choose not to share, but not much ;-) Our son, who is 8, knows we have a blog, but that's it. Someday we'll have to get serious about password protecting the computer.

David (Dad’sHouse) says: My kids avoid my blog like the plague. As for hot women in my life... they avoid me like the plague! (Someone set me up with their sister or their cousin. Okay, or their wife. Whatever!)

Russ (Dads Who Mock the World) says: I don't share that info, and my kids can't read.

LiteralDan says: This one hasn't been a problem for me, both because I haven't gone down this road yet, and because my kids are more at the D-O-G, C-A-T stage of reading. But I'm pretty sure that my wife wouldn't be okay with me getting into it online anyway, so that should leave me a clear field to traumatize my future teenagers in plenty of other ways.

3. My friends accuse me all the time of flirting...I call it being nice, getting along, enjoying someone else's conversation, having cool things in common...

either way...

One of the best things about my guy is that he knows that I'm just being me, he's totally chill about it.

But my girlfriends are telling me that I give my guy friends the wrong idea...that there is NO SUCH THING as having a guy friend when you are married.

I say that is BS...but they don't agree...

But from a guy's perspective how do you feel about there such a thing as innocent flirting amongst males and females? Without being accused of wanting to be a swinger...I'm married so it makes me curious? :)


Blok Thoughts

TentCamper (I Pee In The Wind) says: I am a bit on the fence with this one. I have no problems with her having guy friends…and really not problem with being a bit flirty. I guess that where it may be difficult for me would be if I did not know her guy friends and when she did stuff with them, I was not allowed to go. That would look like she was trying to hide this relationship from me.
Other than that…be flirty, be friends with whoever you want…just keep me involved enough not to worry about the intentions of either party.

Cameron (Get The Stink Off) says: In my opinion, guy / girl relationships exist for one reason only: the guy is hoping to get in the girl's pants. A little flirting might be ok, and maybe it can even spice up a relationship, but the guy you are flirting with is thinking one thing: "I wanna hit that". Guys think with their dicks. The only guy / girl relationship that works is the GAY guy / girl relationship.

DaddyGeekBoy says: As long as there is nothing from one person going into an orifice of the other, I say flirt away. If you and your partner have trust in the relationship, you’ll know where the boundaries are. I have deep trust in my marriage, but it also helps that I’m not the jealous type. It sounds to me like your girlfriends are bringing their own issues into your relationship. If you and your guy are cool, kindly tell your friends to fuck off and go flirt with that guy at the end of the bar who bought you that round of drinks.

Hubman (Hubman’s Hangout) says: Did you read my answer to #1? Flirting is an integral part of getting to know a (hopefully) future lover for both of us. We both flirt all the time. Hey, what's wrong with being a swinger? *wink*But to get back to your question, of course there is such a thing as innocent flirting. As Veronica says "I don't flirt, I'm just friendly!"

Southern Sage (Welcome to Sageville) says: Ok here is one I can opine on. You do not have any straight male friends that have not and do not think of having your ankles on your shoulders and havin some red hot monkey lovin going on up in there. Guys don't have female friends they don't wanna lay. Your intent might be fun and platonic, his is not. He'd hit it. The only way to let him know that isn't your intent is to be a bitch to him all the time.

David (Dad’sHouse) says: There is no innocent flirting. I think married women can have guy friends. But flirting only leads to two things. 1) sex. 2) blue balls. (I love how on hot dads, I can just speak truth, and not be PC)

Russ (Dads Who Mock the World) says: Sure there is, unless my Wife is involved.

LiteralDan says: I say the only unconditional guiding light for advice here is what your partner is comfortable with. You say your husband is totally okay with your brand of flirting, whatever it may be, and if that's true, then you already know it doesn't matter what other people say. One person's bawdy limerick is another's application for a scarlet letter, you know?

Kevin (AlwaysHomeAndUncool) says: I have more female friends than male friends, which on occasion annoys my wife as I'm an incurable flirt. Then she looks deep into her heart and deep into my eyes and remembers that I'm all-talk, no-action. To me, all flirtation is innocent until the flirter acts on it. If the flirtee acts, then he/she needs to accept it when he/she is told he/she was being messed with. Then, the flirtee must walk away and suffer the humiliation in silence, taking it to the grave. You, on the other hand, obviously have some intimacy issues that need to be discussed more in depth, so have a seat on my lap and let's talk more about you.

4. What is one habit (or quirk) that your significant other has that you wish she did not have?


TentCamper (I Pee In The Wind) says: If you read ManicMariah you would know that she has many quirks…but the one that comes to mind instantly is the fact that she has to have Sammy, the fucking Cockatiel, on her shoulder while we eat dinner…and she proceeds to chew food and then let that little fucker eat out her mouth. That has GOT TO STOP!!!

Cameron (Get The Stink Off) says: My wife dunks everything in ranch dressing, and quite honestly, I'm grossed out by the shit. The smell alone makes me sick. We agree to disagree on that.

DaddyGeekBoy says: When it comes to cleanliness, she’s Oscar and I’m Felix.

Hubman (Hubman’s Hangout) says: She often tries to finish my sentences for me, even when it's just the two of us having a conversation. Can I please finish my thought?

Southern Sage (Welcome to Sageville) says: She is a stachel whore. If they sold vibrating gyrating deep plunging satchels that were gainfully employed I'd be gone gone gone.

Russ (Dads Who Mock the World) says: type A personality

LiteralDan says: It really makes me sound like a wife, which is an occupational hazard as a stay-at-home dad, but throwing shit on the floor, especially right next to where it should go, drives me more insane than any child ever will.

I hate cleaning, so I almost never do it, and my way of not ending up on a daytime talk show intervention for pack rats is to at least put whatever easy stuff I can back where it goes when I use it, so if I ever actually do have to clean something, I don't have to spend hours throwing fucking socks in a hamper and sticking the inexplicable million pairs of shoes back into the giant shoe cubby thing we desperately needed, for example.

Hey, anyone have a stress ball handy?

Kevin (AlwaysHomeAndUncool) says: I just asked her what she thought it was and she quickly rattled off half a dozen -- not changing the TP roll, putting near empty food containers back in the fridge, etc. But alas, none of them was her regularly telling me she's too tired for romance then staying awake for another hour to watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.

5. Who do your kid(s) usually come to when they want a “yes” answer…or when they’ve done something wrong.


TentCamper (I Pee In The Wind) says: They go to Mariah…but I am step dad and a tad more cut and dry when it comes to the rules and such. Need to show the kids that I am strong, both as a parent and protector. I am really pretty easy going though.

Cameron (Get The Stink Off) says: I'm the push-over in the family, but I've learned that I prefix everything with, "What did your mom say?" or "Did you ask your mom."

DaddyGeekBoy says: The Bean, who is 3, has recently started asking the other parent the same request when the other gives him an answer he doesn’t like—the tricky little fucker. He hasn’t yet figured out who is the “yes” parent or who is more lenient. Honestly, I’m not sure WonderWife™ and I know that yet either.

Hubman (Hubman’s Hangout) says: Our kids are still too young to figure out how to play us off one another. We're both as likely to be the meany and say "NO!". lol....

Southern Sage (Welcome to Sageville) says: Their momma unless their grandmomma is available.

David (Dad’sHouse) says: They play their mom and me off each other. We're divorced, so it's actually a great skill my kids are honing to keep both of us in the lurch, or to pit the blame on the other home. I think my kids will be outstanding hostage negotiators someday.

Russ (Dads Who Mock the World) says: kids are too young to be that devious.

LiteralDan says: My wife and I are both pretty hard-core, and usually on the same page about discipline and such, at least so far, so I think my kids are both pretty much fucked for finding a soft touch in our house, but then, my daughter hasn't yet hugged me goodbye on her way to the first day of school...

We may have a winner... but not today.

Kevin (AlwaysHomeAndUncool) says: My kids don't play this game with us because we always put up a united front … that being we are both generally pushovers in our own special ways when it comes to them.


Anonymous said...

Good answers all. The quirk one tickled me.

Susan said...

Wow, good Q&A. And I totally agree that there are few men that don't flirt back with the small hope or dream in the back of their mind that they might get laid. Period.

T said...

I do love the Q&A. I dig the honest straight forward answers with you guys. These are my favorite posts. (Haven't I said that already?)

And oh to have a man who would hoist me "upon a golden pedestal festooned with rose petals dipped in chocolate"...


Daddy Geek Boy said...

T...Sorry to say but there's only room for one upon my pedestal. But I can flirt with you if you'd like.

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Excellent question and answer session! I learned a lot about how your minds work (and now I'm especially scared!)

Too many good answers to quote but I especially liked the answer from Cameron to 'when your kids want a yes" That sounds like my house.

And LiteralDan - you may be a 'wife' but you echoed my thoughts exactly on the bad habits. I'm not sure why the top of the counter is the place for dirty dishes when all he has to do is open the dishwasher and throw it in.
The rest of you have any thoughts on why you do that you let me know.

I can't wait to see if there are more next week.

Midlife, menopause, mistakes and random stuff... said...

You dudes are hilarious and obviously pretty H~O~T!!

Steady On
Reggie Girl

MindyMom said...

Love this Q & A! Great answers guys.

And I think flirting is subjective. People tend to see what they want to see when it comes to that.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I like MINDY MOM!!! Honestly..I'm just being me, so I hate being accused of "FLIRTING" such a freakin dirty word when you're least in my neighborhood.

But it's good to know that I can't have any guy I'm going to be looking at them and wondering if IN FACT they think the same way as some of you! :)

UH...sorry offense to the whole swinger comment! :)

UNCOOL-- I think you just solidified the other guys answers :P right? only one thing on your mind! But glad to know that there are others out there that are "incurable flirts"

My husband actually agrees with some of you guys...but said he wouldn't change me for anything...aaahhh its like DaddyGeekBoy except my pedestal is white gold and no rose petals dipped in chocolate...just plain ol' rose pedals...I'm going to have to talk to him about them.

But I asked the question because I wanted the honest answers...thanks guys!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Oh and about bad habits...I HATE when my husband throws his clothes on the floor right next to the hamper? Drives me BATTY! Just saying...

Scandalous Housewife said...

I just love it when you boys give advice. And I think flirting is a turn-on. It puts the GAME ON!

dadshouse said...

I think I figured out why I'm divorced. The priest who married us never gae me that "golden pedestal festooned with rose petals dipped in chocolate" for me to hoist my wife up onto.

Or was I supposed to find that pedestal by myself on eBay?

(Props to husbands who hoist their wives! Stay married, people.)

Cameron said...

Blogging Mama Andrea - I know just enough to keep myself out of trouble (most of the time)

ChocDrop said...

#1. Absolutely not! I might be a little embarrased to know that family knew the REAL things that were really going on.
#2. Flirting is fun...but you don't have to take it to the next level.
#3. My husband does not know I am here. This is kind of an escape for me since I do not have an outlet...since sex is almost non-existant.
#4. My kids are to old to fall in this category, but me and my ex used to talk about ALL decisions when it came to the kids and still do on occasion.

TentCamper said...

Keep the questions comming in!! We need to really show you all how smart we are. We are hot, smart, master love-makers and most of to please YOU!!!!

Wonder Wife said...

OMG, the fact that Mariah lets a bird EAT OUT OF HER MOUTH will give me nightmares tonight. Tent Camper is right - that has GOT to stop, girl.

Mariah said...

Wonder wife- he's exaggerating. The bird eats out of my daughter's mouth.

Love your manly thoughts guys

LiteralDan said...

Anyone who lets a bird eat out of their mouth is just asking for bird flu or something.

Do we need to make a "The More You Know" about this?

SweetPeaSurry said...

Excellent Q&A and here are some comments:

Cameron, I would agree with you for the most part that guy/girl dynamics are about someone gettin' a lil somethin somethin. However, I have a guy pal that I've been friends with for AGES. While in the beginning we flirted and danced around a relationship ... now we're just good friends. We get together once in a while for drinks and to catch up. His wife doesn't care for me ... he doesn't tell her that we get together, I don't care as I know nothing will come of it. That's his cross to bear. (RE: Q3)

Sage ... I'll definately keep the 'being a bitch' in my reserve repatoire! (RE: Q3)

*Shakes my head at Mariah's quirky bird eating out of the mouth thing.* Oh girl. (RE: Q4)

Cameron, ranch dressing is the nectar of the gods. Don't you FORGET it mistah!!! (RE: Q4)

DGB, I have no idea who Oscar and Felix are ... so I'll reserve judgement on that comment until I'm sufficiently 'brought up to speed' (RE: Q4)

Literal Dan, I used to have shoes all over my apartment. Then I got the brilliant idea to get an over the door shoe holder which I hung inside the front coat closet. The first thing I do ... is take my shoes off and put them in that holder. I'm SOOOO proud of myself for this. Now, I just need to figure out how NOT to toss everything on the damned breakfast bar. (RE: Q4)

Amber said...

that what a long post!
Great answers though, always entertaining.

Leo said...

So, I do not really believe it will have effect.
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