Sunday, March 29, 2009

Sunday Slides, Funny, Caption Contest

It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to shout at them. Some are oversensitive and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Julie. When I took early retirement last year, it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job for the extra income that we need. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I now usually get home from the pub about the same time she gets home from work.

Although she knows how hungry I am, she nearly always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't shout at her, instead I tell her to take her time
and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch at the pub so eating out again is out of the question; I'm ready for some home cooked food when I get home. She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's usual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to do the shopping during her lunch hour. But we take them for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then won't hurt her. I like to think tact is one of my strong points. When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods.

She has to take a rest when she was only half finished mowing the lawn and several extra breaks when she's vacuuming through the house. It does annoy me vacuuming when I'm trying to watch match of the day but I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to make herself a nice cup of tea and just sit for a while, and as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too. I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older.

However, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other eh? Ron died suddenly last week. He was found with a 20-inch Stanley screwdriver rammed up his jaxi with only 2 inches showing. His wife Julie was arrested and put on trial. The all-woman jury accepted her defence that he accidentally sat on it.

Ha! I need a shirt like this!

Ever wonder why raincoats are yellow? Well now ya know!

Some people would find these hiring practices wrong, I'm not one of those people!

haaaaaaaaaaaa that looks like something my kids would do!

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.


The great question.... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?


I had some words with my wife, and she had 20some paragraphs with me.
Sigmund Freud

Ok caption contest! Lemme see what y'all got!

Some other slides posted in Sageville (NSFW)

Hope everyone has an awesome weekend!


ChocDrop said...

Aren't you glad some of us have a sense of humor?? I think it is funny, but the sad part is there are women living this way. It is unsure as to why these men are all still alive???!!!! Pick me to be a

Not a soccer mom said...

ok ok I laughed.


"Uhhh mom, where were you last night?"

Single Parent Dad said...

That jury should be ashamed of themselves.

"Mom, have did you leave your breasts on the radiator again?"

Paula aka. Zani said...

Yep.. Ron would have fallen under the category of "He needed killin." Funny.. lol

Caption: Hey! Who switched my regular stuff out for veggie juice?!

Daddy Geek Boy said...

I don't think I can beat Not a Soccer Mom's caption.

Amber said...

"Oh my god the milk is sour!"

skywind said...

Oh, is not it, this is too crazy, too funny. LOL
Health information
Humor & Fun World

TentCamper said...

"Damn, That saline shit tastes NASTY!!!"

Love that t shirt...though it is not the right skin color for me :)

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Okay when I was first reading that story above my jaw was hitting the ground...but the end made it all worth it! LOL!

"I said REGULAR not DIET!"

LiteralDan said...

"Uhhh, Dad? It doesn't really work that way... They're no use-- just give it up and hit the gym."

Anonymous said...

Lol. Excellent captions!

Mine would have been "but MOM I wanted chocolate!"

Not a soccer mom said...

Thank you DGB-
Breastfeeding never really worked with my kids...maybe for the previous reasons.

Funny comments everyone!

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

I'm sure glad Ron got what he deserved! Ever seen Chicago?

"He had it comin'!"

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