Pimpin The Hand-Me-Downs

So, the other day, ManicMariah and I were in a random conversation about aging and getting older. I guess part of it stemmed from her being the caretaker for her grandmother…and having to feed her and change diapers and such. The other part most likely came from me bitching about getting older and acting like a little girl…complaining about my random aches and pains.

She then said that she thought that I’d be a really cute old man. I asked if she would lovingly change my diapers and feed me. Feed me…I got a yes…as for changing diapers, she responded with, “Hell no! I’ll hire some hottie to change your diapers and bathe you.”

Anyway…I guess that got me thinking. Seeing the nurses and elder care workers that come here and that I see around town…nobody has a Mariah by their side. All of them are late middle aged, overweight, unkempt, immigrants who couldn’t fit into a nurse’s outfit if they wanted to.

Here is my idea…..

Company name: Bedside Tail
The deal:
What would be a better fallback job for ‘past their prime’ porn actresses and stripers? Elderly Care. It is not like they have their medical degree to fall back on or a corporate job waiting.

I have witnessed elderly people refusing pills, baths, meals, etc. BUT…I can guarantee you that if I had some buxom (retired) porn actress showing me cleavage and glimpses of her crotch…I’d be all….”I’m ready when you are!!!!”

If I start marketing now and reaching out to porn agents and club owners…maybe they could start sending me their ‘hand-me-downs.’ I’d be like a pimp for elderly clients.

Damn…..the outfits I could have them wear….bathing techniques….’bedtime reading’…


OH….this could be fun!!!!

(Oh…wait…this is not real…SHIT!!!!!!!!!