Thursday, February 5, 2009

Introducing.... Me

How the heck did I end up here? The first I heard from Bedside Talesman was "I have been told by a few people now that you need to get involved in this new blog that I started...".

To which I replied "A few people told you I need to get involved? I sense smoke being blown up my ass, but that's alright!"

In any case, I happily accepted the offer.

Since this is a bunch of guys who may or may not know each other from our main blogs (I only knew Bedside Talesman and Southern Sage before) I figured I would start by introducing myself.

I'm very happily married for 15 yrs to my college sweetheart (check out her blog here, if you're so inspired) and we have 2 kids, Darling Boy, 8 yrs old, and Princess Persistent, who is not quite 3 yrs old. My wife is known on the blogs as Another Suburban Mom (ASM) and as Veronica. We've been through a lot together- finishing college, several graduate degrees, numerous moves and job changes. We are both career-driven individuals trying to balance work and home lives.

I LOVE being a dad. Not to say it doesn't drive me nuts some days... But sometimes I wonder if I'm doing things "right". I imagine that I'll share some of those doubts here.

Some of my baggage is that not only are mine and my wife's parents divorced, but there are serious issues with both of our fathers. My dad is an alcoholic, recovered now, and a wonderful grandpa to the kids, but not so good when I was growing up. He tried, he really did, but in many ways I hope I do "better" with my kids than he did with me. Is it bad that I look up to my step-father as a role model more than my own dad?

Veronica's dad? When she was getting ready to head off to college he informed her that he thought she was destined for failure and by helping pay for her education he would be wasting his money. Their relationship declined from there, to the point when we got married 4 yrs later he was not invited to our wedding. When each of our kids were born she wrote him a letter telling him about them, in an effort to repair the relationship and allow our kids to know their paternal grandfather. His response? Absolutely nothing. We never heard from him.

So that's a little about me.

Thanks for the invite- this should be fun!

Posted by Hubman


Blogging Mama Andrea said...

This is my first visit here and I didn't find this place on my own (that's thanks to Shelle at BlokThoughts) I will say I like the concept of this place and the frank discussions/posting going on.

I'm a fiction writer so maybe it will help if I hang around and try to listen to what guys really think.

Anonymous said...

Welcome Hubs.

Anonymous said...

Nice to meet you hubman. Interesting forum where a bunch of guys can tell what's on their mind.

Sorry about your dads. But if it means that it makes you try harder as a father, I'm glad. Daddies are important. Real important.

Anonymous said...

Hubman broke his Hot Dad cherry!!!!!!

Great intro...and I can tell you that things are the same with me and my father and step-dad. It did, thought, make me want to do things better.

Youngblood4ever said...

I'm ready for some great stories, Hubman.

Mariah said...

Hi Hubman I'm bedsidetales man's fiance. Glad to meet you and I will check out your wifes blog too! I really love reading the guys point of view. Sad about Veronica's dad not responding, that sucks

T said...

Hey Hubman! Nice to finally (cyber)meet ya!

Veronica's dad sounds much like mine, unfortunately. We eventually made amends during the last months before he passed away with cancer last year. I'm grateful for the forgiveness I found.

I look forward to reading you! I have 7 and 4 year old daughters so ... I feel your pain.

Can't wait to read your entries!

ChurchPunkMom said...

Nice to 'meet' you Hubman.. looking forward to hearing more from you.. ;)

thefirstdayofautumn said...

ok, so now i have the background and will have to link another suburban mom as well. that's cool. it's so difficult with family relationships. i know i struggle to provide my children with much from my family. not many calls or visits. it's just the 3 of us, my 2 boys and me. luckily, my exhusband is an excellent father and we share them 50/50. i have them a week, then he has them a week. they do get the family nurturing over there as their dad's family lives close, and their stepmother's family visits and calls often.

Mariposa said...

Wow...on Veronica's Dad...send my hugs to her!

And it is never bad to look up on anyone as a role model, if it helps be become better people...and paternity is not only limited to blood relations...

I always look up to anyone who wants nothing but to be the parents they can be to their children!

Nice to meet you Hubman...

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