Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The Pauli Girl Was Nice, But...


I do not remember for sure the first time I ever had a beer, when I was growing up. I know it must have been sometime around when I was 15 years old, typical adolescent hijinks and skullduggery involved to “score some brewskis”. I know it was with a group of my friends, my drinking buddies, if such a thing could be said of kids who were years away from being able to legally drink. We didn’t have much money then, and even less common sense, so the emphasis was on whatever we could get. My buddies drank Budweiser; I was the holdout for Pabst Blue Ribbon (in bottles, thank you very much). We didn’t much care, as long as it was there.

I do remember the first time I became aware of how much I liked beer, and it happened on a late summer evening, sitting at a picnic table with a bottle of PBR in my hand. I remember sitting there picking at the label and joking with my friends, watching the sun go down behind the trees and houses across the road. I titled that bottle back and swallowed a big mouthful: it hit me that this tasted so good, I couldn’t believe it. I wanted more, but not so much to get drunk. The buzz was certainly sought after, but I just really dug the taste, the slightly stinging bitterness, the faint sweet taste of the malt. Although I certainly wouldn’t have been able to describe it that way at the time; I didn’t know anything about it. It took years and a lot more beer before I knew what really was in it. But I never forgot that first moment of illumination.


It was also about the same time that I had my very first kiss. I very clearly remember that moment. It also happened while sitting on a bench, on a fall afternoon, in a park not too far from my boyhood home. My best friend and I, along with our girlfriends, had gone for a walk in the park to “get some fresh air” (wink, nudge). There was a little pond there next to a garden amongst some very tall pine trees, with benches scattered about. We were walking around in the garden and my friend, being more forward thinking in these matters, quickly made a beeline for a more secluded section of the garden, girlfriend in tow. Before I knew it, I lost track of them, leaving me alone with HER.

Not knowing what else to do, we found a bench and sat down, close together and barely touching. It was like we thought we would explode if our bodies came into contact, matter and anti-matter. But contact was inevitable; the gravitational pull was too strong. We held hands and watched some squirrels, sitting there in the afternoon sun, and then it happened.

Ka-BLAM. I think we turned to each other intending to say something but the momentum just carried us right into a kiss. Just like that. I was so stunned (and dizzy) that all I could think to do was to put my arm around her and just keep on kissing. Which we did. To the point of not being able to breathe.

For the shy, dorky kid that I was (and in some ways, still am) that moment was transcendental. I had never done anything so intimate, so personal, so physically intoxicating, in my life to that point. I still recall the golden light from the sun, her hair swirling around my face and tickling my cheeks and the sheer heart-racing power of being so close to a female who seemed to like me too. To quote Monty Python, from The Martyrdom of St. Victor:

“…but on the sixteenth day, he cried out, saying “This is FANTASTIC! OH, this is TERRIFIC!”

And it was. I was dizzy, I was swooning, and I felt drunk. The irony of it is, she and I broke up not too long after that. Even so, the taste of strawberry lip gloss never really left me after that day, much like the taste of barley malt swallowed on a summer eve. For me the first beer and the first kiss had a lot in common. They both opened my eyes to a larger world of possibilities, awakening my senses to delightful things previously unknown. They both impressed upon me the ecstasy and the agony of pleasure, making it clear that in drinking deep of certain things one must be very careful not to lose control.

They made me aware of the power of touch, taste, smell.

The secret to enjoying a beer or a kiss, really, really enjoying I mean, is to approach each one as if it were the first you ever had.

But, seriously? If I could have the opportunity to do one again, I’d take the first kiss over the first beer, any day…both may make you warm and fuzzy but a kiss is the stuff of life, my friends, the stuff of life

17 comments:

TentCamper said...

I will tell you my man...I paused to reflect several times while reading that.

PBR...PLEASE tell me that you have move to a slightly better brand.

As for the kiss...I totally remember the firston...well...the first one that really meant something.

Great post

Mariah said...

Love this. Firsts are always special when they mean something, weather it's a kiss, an embrassing hug or a fresh cold beer.

Susan said...

This is so great... I totally want to make out with my husband as soon as I see him later....


Mmmmm...

Jenn said...

It is nice to see other beer lovers out there. Times with either friends and family with a cold beer are always the best days.

Barefoot Dreamer said...

Seriously who knew a post about beer and kissing could stir up so many fond memories... I like yours better though ;)

Well written I love it.

Miss Grace said...

St Pauli Girl is the beer my parents buy.

I prefer to think that they don't kiss. Or have sex. Well. They had sex five times exactly, for those five kids they ended up with.

Irish Gumbo said...

@Tentcamper: Yes, I did move on to other better beers...many, many beers...mmm...

And for those inspired to make out, I salute you! All part of the service pack that is Irish Gumbo!

Anonymous said...

Hey hey hey... lay off the PBR. It is an AWARD WINNING beer!

Cathy said...

Lovely post! I hope the first guy I kissed has such fond memories. I know I do.

I used to pilfer my Dad's PBR. Learned at an early age to drink beer right out of the bottle.

I have no class but a deep appreciation for the taste of beer.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Wow.. that was kinda, ROMANTIC...

I kinda swooned myself.

Although I'm not a beer drinker... I do remember my first kiss/make out... and it was close to LIFE ALTERING!

So great post, is what I'm saying...

Now I'm off to daydream and wait for my guy to get home!

Vodka Mom said...

I LOVED this story- very well written.

And the story from a guy perspective? You gave us a little gift. thank you..........

Vodka Mom said...

oh, my friend Irish sent me. And I'm damn glad he did.

only a movie said...

Nice work, Irish. Like to read the guy's perspective. Why haven't I seen this site before? Good stuff.

Not a soccer mom said...

I loved this post! mmm Alsthough I love beer, I think I love kisses much better!

The Exception said...

This is a fabulous post - love it and love those first kisses!

M said...

PBR in bottles....the small little bar that I frequent still sells the shit out of it.

I honestly don't remember my first drink....or my first kiss. Must not have been anything special

I never did get into beer, still can't stand it. I'm a whiskey girl with a little wine, liquor, and "malt beverage" (chick drinks) thrown in.

ric said...

85cc免費影片,免費影片,免費小遊戲,免費遊戲,小遊戲,遊戲,好玩遊戲,好玩遊戲區,A片,情趣用品,遊戲區,史萊姆好玩遊戲,史萊姆,遊戲基地,線上遊戲,色情遊戲,遊戲口袋,我的遊戲口袋,小遊戲區,手機遊戲,貼圖,A片下載,成人影城,愛情公寓,情色貼圖,情色,色情網站,色情遊戲,色情小說,情色文學,色情,aio交友愛情館,色情影片,臺灣情色網,寄情築園小遊戲,情色論壇,嘟嘟情人色網,情色視訊,愛情小說,言情小說,一葉情貼圖片區,情趣用品,情趣,色情漫畫,情色網,情色a片,情色遊戲,85cc成人片,嘟嘟成人網,成人網站,18成人,成人影片,成人交友網,成人貼圖,成人圖片區,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人光碟,微風成人區,免費成人影片,成人漫畫,成人文學,成人遊戲,成人電影,成人論壇,成人,做愛,aio,情色小說,ut聊天室,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,尋夢園聊天室,080視訊聊天室,免費視訊聊天,哈啦聊天室

Related Posts with Thumbnails