Craigslist Baby Crib And Stripper Pole Search

While browsing Craigslist for a used crib for our upcoming second offspring, my wife discovered this:



Okay, so from this listing we can deduct a few things. It is apparent this chick is having a baby, that‘s why she’s searching for a crib. I am going out on a limb here, but it seems that she also realizes that money is often required to care for a baby. So because she is a high school dropout, who got knocked up by the 35 year old alcoholic down the street who was living out of his moms garage, she never got her degree or GED. So she feels that she can’t apply anywhere that would pay enough to support another fatherless child. That is why she has been contemplating whether stripping would be the job for her. So she wants a stripper pole to learn the classy art of whoring herself out for money. For the kids of course. And while she is learning the most affective positions in which one can wrap their legs around a pole while swiping at one dollar bills, she thought it best to start cleaning houses to pay for her pole dancing certification classes. Now, the only thing I’m not sure about, is what she plans to put up for bartering in return for all these things. Because god knows we don’t want her getting pregnant again.