Saturday, January 9, 2010

Colt, Football, Texas, The SEC, Roll Tide

Colt, my buddy Colt. Seems you were the QB of the #2 ranked team in the nation last night until the first time you got hit.



Well Colt in the SEC we play tackle football! Damn man you let the whole state down. What kind of football do they play in the tiny 10 or the sissy SW conference or whatever poor assed conference you play the season in? Do they play flag or touch football in Texas? They must, maybe powder puff! Yeah you should thrive there.

I get hit harder than that by my kids. If you don't grow a set and get a lot tougher the NFL will stand for "Not For Long" for you. There are an ass load of SEC players in the NFL. They seem to be a lot tougher in the South East than they are in your part of town.



I don't know about everyone else watching but you sure didn't do much for your image with me. I can't imagine anyone ever rooting for a team you play for ever. You laid down it looked like to me. One hit, you took one hit. Then you came out after the game and talked to camera, under your own power. Dood some advice from me.

If I was the all mighty and powerful QB of the mighty burnt Orange Long horns and I was the Heisman hopeful and all that they would have carried me off in an ambulance, or they would have carried me back to the sidelines in a body cast or I would have cowboy'd up and played, like a man. I can guarantee you this Colt, Tebow would have played. He would have played hurt, if his arm tingled a little bit he would have played. If he couldn't feel his arm he would have played one armed. I always hear about how good football is in Tx but you didn't do diddly for that image last night.

I keep hearing about your stats. How did you compile all those stats Colt? Against who? Being knocked out of the Championship game with that little pat makes me tend to think that you were playing some damn easy competition. It looks like your stats would have read pretty much 00000000 had you played in the SEC or anything other than patsy teams. Stats smats, thats what I now say about yours. In the no hit the QB conference what do stats count for anyway?

Yeah you are going to get the money and I'm envious, I am. It doesn't bother me and I hope you get a damn bunch of it. I don't wish you ill in the future either. I won't be rooting for you but I don't wish you any ill will.

Well Colt next time take some more advice from me, get your trapper keeper Colty.

Cowboy up.
Nike.
putcher big girl panties on.
strap it on.
Pull your jock strap up tight.

Be a man.

Sage is out.

3 comments:

Southern Sage said...

Did I say Tebow woulda played?
He woulda.

Nonflammable said...

tebow's the man!

Keith Wilcox said...

The SEC was 6-2 this year in their bowls. The big 12 was 4-4. The pac 10 was 2-5 I think (maybe 2-6 I can't remember). Seems the SEC consistently dominates bowl games. Some Day, SEC, you shall fall! (Shakes fist in the air).

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